I Would Never Cause You Pain
by Rouch
Summary: Lee and Amanda track down a terrorist, occurs two weeks after
1. Default Chapter Title

**_I Would Never Cause You Pain_**

**"…he's not going to be there." Amanda was finishing as her and Lee entered the Q bureau.**

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**"Amanda why wouldn't he be there?" Lee asked clearly annoyed.**

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**"If I were him I wouldn't be there." She stated calmly.**

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**Lee had to smile at that, "Amanda if you were a national terrorist--"**

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**"Stetson that's not what I meant and you know it. Just listen. IF I was trying to keep a low profile because the best agents in America were looking for me I would not hide out in a warehouse. It's too cliché."**

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**"The best agents?" Lee questioned grinning.**

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**"I was talking about me and Francine." she replied with a sparkle in her eyes.**

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**"Oh really." He stared blankly at her and with a one swift motion Lee had Amanda pinned against the wall kissing her passionately. Her eyes were wide with shock, and when Lee broke off breathless he met her gaze. He was about to triumphantly declare he was the better agent when he saw the panic in her eyes. He cursed himself. She had recovered from her ordeal with Birol so quickly Lee had almost forgotten she still had flashbacks. Apparently his stunt caused another scene to her recall. "Amanda, I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" He asked quietly.**

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**She was shaking a bit and closed her eyes to compose herself. "I'm okay. It just… I just… need a minute," she answered after finding her voice.**

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**"Come here," He hugged her gently. She was stiff but after a few minutes relaxed. **

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**Francine walked through the door and surveyed the scene. She was catching those two more and more. When would they learn that they weren't fooling anyone? She was about to comment when she saw the tears running down Amanda's face. She and Amanda weren't the closest friends but they were friends. The truth was that she was jealous at first because Amanda was better at their job then she was. That was solitified by the case with Birol. She never put herself first to escape and she never showed weakness… in public put occasionally Francine would catch her locked in a memory staring at nothing. Obviously something had happened to cause her to be this upset. "Lee, Amanda," she started quietly. Lee looked at the blonde. The pain in his eyes clearly showed. "Billy wants us in his office. He thinks he has a lead on Armon."**

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**"We'll be there in a minute." Lee began to answer.**

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**"Lee go ahead, I'll meet you down there." Amanda whispered.**

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**He started to protest but knew she needed to compose herself before she met with their section chief. "Okay." He replied and whispered in her ear, "I would never cause you pain. I'm sorry."  
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**Puzzled at first Amanda realized Lee was blaming himself for her reaction.**

**He had caught her off guard. Normally she would have enjoyed such a passionate kiss; however she was reminded of Addi Birol pinning her in a corner and kissing her roughly. He pressed her so hard she wanted to cry. At the time she tried to pretend it was Lee, anything to get through it but it hadn't worked. Her fear choked her as Birol began groping her. Amanda cast the thought away with a shiver and looked at Lee. She knew he needed some confirmation that she was okay and wasn't angry with him. "It's not your fault, it was Addi… I know you would never hurt me." She squeezed his hand in reassurance. "I will be right there." **

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**Lee didn't want to leave her but he didn't want to argue with her either. He silently walked out the door with Francine but his mind stayed in the office.**

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**"…Pike's warehouse. I want you and Amanda to lead the strike." Billy was finishing as Amanda walked into her superior's office. "Good morning Amanda how are you?" Melrose asked.**

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**"Fine, sir."**

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**"I was filling Lee and Francine in a lead on Armon's location."**

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**"At a warehouse?" She questioned with a smirk. Lee was relieved to see she had composed herself but he still worried. She was meeting with Dr Pfaff but he felt she was doing so well he only wanted her to check in every week. Lee knew his Amanda. She had buried the fear while Birol had her and had not let it all out. She was dealing with it now but she would never truly move on until she confronted her memories. He shot her a look in reply to her warehouse comment, "yes, at a warehouse." He smiled.**

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**Billy knew something had passed between his two best agents and it pleased him. Lee had been a good agent before Amanda but now he was the best. He needed her to complete him. Billy watched over the past three years as Lee leaned on Amanda, but now it was Amanda's turn to lean on Lee. He was concerned that she had returned to work too soon. Her debriefing was difficult. Billy had sat through thousands of debriefings but with Amanda it was different. She always saw the good in people and she never carried a gun. Billy doubted she would kill someone even to save her life or someone else's. That's what made her such a good agent. She found alternatives. Where a seasoned agent would shoot she would talk. Amanda referred to it once as 'confusing them into surrender'. "I want you three to work on organizing a strike team and I want it rolling in one hour." He ordered. **

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**Amanda and Lee headed purposefully to the task room. "Amanda are you sure you should go?" Lee asked.**

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**"Lee I'm fine. Besides he won't be there anyway remember." She answered trying to lighten the mood and change the subject.**

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**Lee caught on that now was not the time to push the issue with Birol and he took her queue of humor. "You're so sure he's not there aren't you?"**

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**"Positive." She answered quickly.**

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**"How do you know? I bet you he's there as we speak." Lee returned.**

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**"A bet huh?"**

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**She caught him off guard, "Uh yeah." He stumbled. He hadn't thought she would take his comment serious.**

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**"Winner chooses the stakes?" She questioned.**

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**Lee's eyes lit up, he liked where this was going. They had been dating for a few months and he proposed while Birol had them but they hadn't had a lot of time alone. He was seeing an opportunity for just that. "I'm game. The winner gets their deepest desire fulfilled."**

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**Her eyes widened pleased. Either way she had a feeling she would win this bet. "Okay, but we write our 'deepest desire' down now and reveal them to each other after I win." She teased.**

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**"Deal, only after we arrest Armon at that warehouse." She laughed an 'you're funny but I will win' laugh and they searched for some paper and a pen.**

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**An hour later Lee and Amanda pulled up to the warehouse in his corvette and a van behind them containing the other agents. "Amanda why don't you wait in the van?" He asked.**

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**Just as he said it he saw the fear rise up in her eyes again. "Lee… I can't. Last time I waited in the van…" She trailed off and instantly he was sorry. He was sorry for opening his mouth and he was sorry for ordering her to wait in the van that day. It never occurred to him that his order was the reason Birol got her. Once again he had hurt her with out knowing it.**

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**"Amanda, I had no idea, it never dawned on me. The whole thing. It was my fault." He answered**

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**"No. No Lee it wasn't your fault you shouldn't think that. I didn't mean to make you feel guilty, I just need to be by your side now."**

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**"Always," he answered. They got out of the van and met the rest of their team. Everyone was checking their guns and there was anticipation in the air.**

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**Francine walked over to Amanda and pulled her aside. She placed a gun in her friend's hands. Amanda felt the weight and coldness in her hands and looked up at Francine questioningly. "Please Amanda take this with you. Even if you don't use it. The bad guys aren't afraid of a purse even if you yell freeze." Francine joked reminding Amanda of the first case she was recruited on. The only way to save Lee was to pretend she had a gun and distract the man long enough for Lee to take him out. Francine had never let Amanda live it down.**

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**Amanda smiled and appreciated the gesture. "Thank you Francine. I know people have been sort of walking on eggshells since I came back. I'm okay really though. I have flashbacks but Dr Pfaff said to expect those."**

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**"It's just that this case is a little too close to home you know?" Francine answered nervously.**

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**"I know Francine, believe me I know. I keep reminding myself that Birol is behind bars. But he's no different than any other terrorist we face."**

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**"No he's not. All terrorist manipulate you mind with fear. Addi used physical threats and pain but Armon uses drugs. Armon won't hesitate to turn friends against each other either." Francine had hit a nerve. Amanda heard about a Russian agent killing his partner because Armon drugged him. Addi had used Lee to get to her but Armon would use Lee to hurt her. She shuttered and squeezed her friend's hand. **

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**"Alright let's roll." Lee announced. He leaned over and whispered to Amanda, "I've got a bet to win." She slapped him with her left hand and that's when he noticed the gun. He knew she scored high on her target practice, higher than Francine but Amanda wouldn't let him rub it in her face, but when it came to shooting people, even pictures of people she hesitated. **

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**She noticed his gaze on her revolver. "Francine thought it would be more threatening than my hand." She smiled sticking her thumb up and index finger out. Lee nodded his approval and they converged on the vacant looking warehouse. Entering through the back Lee was taken by surprise as he was knocked aside and Amanda was grabbed. The man held a knife to her throat drawing blood as he pressed it against her skin. **

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**"Back up Scarecrow or the woman dies." He ordered. Lee recognized him as Armon's brother Raul. Amanda was frozen. She felt the cold steel digging into her throat. Lee begged her with his eyes to use the gun she still clutched in her right hand. Raul hadn't seen the weapon and seemed over confident, but if Amanda didn't use it she was dead. Lee watched as Raul started to push harder on the knife. Amanda moaned as blood flowed. She shut her eyes and thought of her boys. She couldn't die and leave them alone. If she could see her captor position she knew she could just wound him, but she was blinded by darkness and pain. She also knew she had one chance and she couldn't blow it. Amanda inhale and brought the gun up behind her back and fire one shot. She fell to the ground as the man slumped over onto her. Her knees were weak already and the added weight caused her to go down like a sack of bricks. **

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**"Amanda!" Lee cried and rolled Raul off her. She was cover with his blood as well as her own and she was in shock. Lee placed pressure on her neck and ordered Francine to call for an ambulance as she rounded the corner having heard the shot. All she had seen was a lot of blood and Amanda on the ground. This was enough to cause her to sprint to the van. **

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**"Did I ki—Is he dead?" She questioned.**

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**"I think so Amanda he gave you no choice. He was about to kill you."**

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**She only nodded her agreement and hugged him tightly. He heard the sirens coming closer. Francine ran up with the paramedics behind her. They were directed to Amanda but she protested. "No, look at him first. See if you can save him." **

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**"Amanda--"**

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**"Lee I shot him."**

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**"And he tried to slice your neck open." He fought back still placing pressure on her wound. It didn't seem serious but Lee wasn't taking any chances. **

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**"I have to know, I don't want to live knowing I hadn't tried everything possible." She answered back.**

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**The paramedics turned their attention back to Amanda realizing the effort was hopeless. The bullet had penetrated his heart. "He's gone. Died instantly." They informed her as they started tending to her. Lee backed away just enough to let them work but he clutched her hand. The knife had gone deep but blood wasn't spurting. "He missed the artery, barely though." The paramedic replied. "Is any thing else hurt?"**

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**Amanda thought for an instant and noticed a dull pain in her side. Rubbing the sore area the man took a look. There was a faint hand shaped bruise starting where Raul was restraining her and several other black and blue marks surrounding it. "This one's fresh but these others, when did you get them?" Amanda was questioned groaning as hands poked around the wounded area.**

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**Amanda glanced at Lee. He had pain etched all over his face. "Those are from two weeks ago. Apparently I'm a magnet to terrorists." She replied trying to lighten the mood. She squeezed Lee's hand, "I'm okay. It doesn't hurt."**

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**"This one will. He may have cracked a rib." Amanda was informed groaning as he pushed on her rib.**

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**"Amanda…" Lee began.**

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**"I didn't notice. I was preoccupied with a knife." She answered.**

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**"Can you walk Mrs. King?"**

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**"I think so." Amanda began to stand and staggered a little. It was more than resolve that kept her on her feet. Lee had a tight grip on her are to steady her. "Can't breath…"**

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**To be continued…**

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	2. Default Chapter Title

**_I Would Never Cause You Pain****_**

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**Lee was pacing in the ER waiting room. Billy walked up to his friend and laid a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Scarecrow, Francine just got a hold of me. Do you know her condition?"**

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**Lee looked up in frustration. "I don't know! The N.E.S.T. team has been working on her for almost an hour!"**

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**"Calm down Lee. Tell me what happened." Melrose tried to redirect his agent's attention. He knew Lee would run through fire if he thought it would help Amanda.**

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**"Raul grabbed her from behind after knocking me out of the way. I should have checked the corner closer. It was dark, but that's no excuse. Amanda shot him before he slit her throat, but he cut her and somehow cracked or broke some of her ribs in the process. She fainted after the paramedics got there and they rushed her here." Lee answered gaining his composure after switching into agent mode. As he was finishing the doctor walked into the waiting room.**

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**"Hi I'm Dr. Taylor. You must be the Lee Mrs. King is insisting that she see?"**

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**"Yes, how is she? Can I go see her?" He asked impatiently.**

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**"She doing fine. Her neck needed ten stitches but any scare should be very faint; it was a straight cut. Amanda also has two cracked ribs, which are making her breathing difficult, but our biggest concern at this point is shock. When she came in her temperature was very low as was her blood pressure and O2 stats."**

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**"How can we help?" Billy asked.**

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**"Right now, encourage her to talk about it. Is this the first time she's shot anyone?"**

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**"Yes, and I was surprised to hear she had." Billy admitted.**

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**"She didn't have a choice Billy! She was seconds away from never making another choice!" Lee shouted.**

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**"Easy Scarecrow. I wasn't implying that she wasn't justified." Melrose reprimanded and turned to the doctor. "I'll notify Dr Pfaff."**

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**"I've already done so. He said he'd be here in an hour."**

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**Lee regarded the doctor, "How did Raul crack her ribs. It didn't look like his hold was that tight." **

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**"We're waiting on a tox screen but my guess is drugs. Many drugs, especially when in overdose cause increased strength." Taylor answered.**

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**Lee allowed his comment to sink in. After all his years in the field he preferred physical pain to drugs any day. A punch to the gut, that he could defend; toxins in the body, foreign soil. "Can I go see her?"**

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**"Yes but not too long she does need her rest. I'd say not at all but considering the shock she needs all the support she can get. Does she have any family we should notify?"**

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**"No, we'll take care of it." Lee answered before Billy and walked toward Amanda's room. **

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**Armon had just heard the news. Damn that brother of his. How many times had he told him 'never a warehouse the Feds always find you in a warehouse'.And besides that it's not very creative. His mother always told him to stick up for his family and now was definitely the time to honor his mother. Armon had heard stories about Scarecrow and his new partner. They were unbeatable or so the rumors flew. This Mrs. King would pay for making him an only child, and he had just the drug he had been wanting to test.**

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**Lee gently closed the door behind him as he walked into Amanda's room. She looked like she was sleeping but Lee could see the tension in her face and knew that her rest couldn't be sound. He quietly pulled a chair up to her bedside and took her hand. She jumped slightly at the touch and grimaced as pain reminded her of her cracked ribs. "Amanda, I'm sorry I startled you." He whispered.**

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**"I'm okay. You seem to be saying sorry a lot lately." She teased.**

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**"You seem to be saying your okay a lot lately." Lee answered seriously.**

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**"I'm fine really. My side's just a little sore." **

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**"Amanda you're not fine. I can see it in your eyes. You hate firing a gun let alone holding one. You need to talk to someone about this and Birol before it destroys you." He replied in one breath.**

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**Tears were welling up in her eyes. When she spoke Lee could barely hear her, "I killed someone."**

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**"I know. I'm sorry you were even in that position. It's my job to keep you safe."**

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**"The whole time Addi had me, killing him was never an option in my eyes even if I was given the chance. While I sat in that white room not allowed to sleep I never thought about the boys. I don't know if I was protecting myself or what but as Raul was pushing his knife into my neck all I could think about was Phillip and Jamie. How could I hurt them by dying? Every time we've been in tight spots I never think about home. Staying focused on the task that's my job, but now it's different. Why is it different? How can I face them knowing I killed a man?" Amanda asked. Her tears where flowing down her face but her voice was calm and steady.**

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**"I know how hard it is when feelings get in the way, but believe me those feelings make you a better agent. You taught me that Amanda King. Before we were partners I never thought about alternatives but now if I have time to think I do. Sometimes though there is no other way. You did the only thing you could do, don't second-guess yourself you'll drive yourself crazy with 'whatifs'. As far as facing Phillip and Jamie, do you have any idea how many deaths and drug deals Raul was responsible for? You made the world a safer place for your boys today."**

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**"I love you." Amanda answered.**

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**Lee took her in his arms and hugged her gently. Amanda deepened the hug pressing herself against him. "I love you too Amanda. With all my heart." After a few minutes Lee reluctantly broke the embrace. "Dr. Pfaff should be here soon. Once he clears you, you should be able to go home okay?" Amanda nodded. "After all you need to recuperate to fulfill my deepest desire." He said smiling.**

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**Amanda pulled completely away. "No way. Armon wasn't at the warehouse."**

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**"No but his brother was there. Armon must have left before we got there."**

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**"Lee Phillip and Jamie are brothers and I don't know two people who disagree more." Amanda countered.**

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**"I do." Dr Pfaff answered from the doorway. Neither Lee nor Amanda had heard his entrance.**

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**"That's not funny." Lee answered back. "Amanda and I are partners. We're supposed to think differently so the one can pick up on details the other doesn't see." Lee knew when he was beat and threw up his hands in exasperation. He hated how Pfaff always saw right through him, but that was his job, but he didn't have to give him that 'you're not fooling anyone' look. "Okay I'm leaving. Amanda call me when you're ready to leave and I'll come and get you." She nodded and Lee walked out giving them some privacy.**

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**"How are you feeling?" Lee heard Pfaff say and he left the hospital happy that Amanda had finally begun to open up. Lee knew all about suppressing emotions and he didn't want Amanda to be as miserable as he was before he met her. He smiled thinking of how Amanda had never given up on him, even when he pushed her away she pushed back just as hard. He was so deep in thought he never noticed the black Mustang following him.**

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**To be Continued…**

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	3. Default Chapter Title

**_I Would Never Cause You Pain****_**

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**Armon had followed the silver Vette to a secured parking garage near a building designated IFF. He parked his Mustang on the street and waited. He was a patient man. He wanted both Lee and the King woman, but the timing had to be perfect. He smiled staring at the vials of clear liquid. Yes he certainly would enjoy this one.**

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**"No mother I haven't had time until now to tell you." Amanda answered her mother's twenty questions over the phone. She knew that there was no easy way to explain her neck and ribs away. Two weeks ago she was able to appease her mom with 'I was dehydrated because I had a really bad case of the flu and I got those bruises because I fainted down some stairs. Yes those are circles under my eyes, no I haven't slept well in the past four days and yes I'm a little jumpy.' Now she seriously doubt I had the flu would explain her neck. She settled on "I was mugged."**

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**"You were what?!" Dotty's voice could be heard as Amanda held the phone away from her ear.**

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**"I'm at the hospital." Again Amanda held the phone out of yelling range bracing for her mother's response.**

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**"You're where?!"**

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**"Mother don't worry I'm fine. I'll be home in about an hour."**

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**"Don't worry? How am I supposed to not worry?"**

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**"Just don't." Amanda answered simply. "Tell the boys I love them and will be home shortly."**

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**"How are you getting home?"**

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**"It's been taken care of."**

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**Dotty was quiet for a moment. "Well will we see Mr. Stetson when you get here?"**

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**"I don't know mother," Amanda replied smiling. "Good bye." Hanging up the phone she shook her head. Her biggest fear in life was that the axiom 'you grow up to be just like your parents' was true. She loved her mom dearly but she was just hard to take some days.**

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**Lee got out of his car at the hospital parking garage. As he headed for the elevator he felt a prick on his neck. His hand shot up to examine the area, bringing his hand down he saw a small drop of blood and spun around to face Armon. Lee tried to react but his vision blurred and he felt his world going dark. As he hit the pavement he heard Armon telling him something but he couldn't make out the words and he surrendered to the darkness.**

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**Amanda waited quietly on her bed. She had called Lee almost an hour ago and he still wasn't there. The drive from IFF to the hospital, even if the traffic was bad, was only 30 minutes. Amanda smiled in spite of herself. Funny how she knew that, obviously they frequented this place way too often. "Maybe he got tied up with paper work or something." She said to herself and gave 15 minutes before calling him again. "Geez Amanda King you're way too paranoid." She continued to talk to herself unaware that the door had opened.**

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**"I try to tell her that on a daily basis but she never listens. 'Amanda King' I'd say, 'you're way too paranoid who do you think you are a spy or something?' and then she'd—" Lee stopped as Amanda punched him in the arm. "— slap me on the arm. Ow! Since when did you punch?" He asked still in a good mood as he rubbed his arm.**

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**"Since I started taking self defense with Dr. Pain and since you stopped calling when you're running late." She answered in mock seriousness.**

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**"Late? Amanda I left right after I hung up the phone with you." Lee replied a little confused. He had a strange feeling that something happened but he could place it.**

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**"Lee that was an hour ago. IFF is only 30 minutes away."**

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**"What time is it?" He asked now very confused.**

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**"5:30. And while were on the subject I think we come here too often. I mean why should I know that at six in the morning the trip will take 22 minutes but at five in the afternoon the trip will take 31 minutes. Don't you think that's odd. Don't you think—"**

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**"Amanda you're rambling."**

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**"I know I'm rambling. I just want to leave here and I want to see if we could not come back for the rest of the month. Is that too much to ask?"**

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**"I love it when you ramble. Come here." Lee answered putting his arms around her waist and gave her a soft kiss on the lips.**

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**"I love you too you just had me worried."**

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**"I know. I don't know what to tell you I left right after you called. Hey maybe I met some hot babe—"**

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**"Watch it Scarecrow or I'll punch you again." She laughed as Lee gave her another more passionate kiss to silence her. "Can we go?" She asked.**

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**"Your chariot awaits." He answered breathless from the kiss. Reluctantly he released her.**

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**Armon watched as Lee and Amanda turned out of the hospital and followed them a discreet distance before turning off. He had some details to attend to before his guests arrived. The drug in Stetsons system would work for another 4 hours; plenty of time to prepare. Soon Raul would be avenged and he wouldn't have to lift a finger.**

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**They pulled into Amanda's driveway and she began to get nervous. "Lee I told mother I was mugged. I'm not sure if that was the right story."**

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**"Amanda, I know you hate lying but what else could you do?"**

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**"Tell them I was trying to apprehend an international terrorist when I was accosted from behind and threatened with a knife while my partner could do nothing and so I had to shoot…" Amanda stopped. "I guess that would lead to too many questions huh." She finished quietly.**

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**"Yeah and I've got that hot date tonight remember. No time to explain to Dotty why that partner of yours wasn't on the ball."**

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**"Lee—" Amanda started but was interrupted by Jamie knocking on her window.**

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**"Mom? Are you okay? Grandma said you were in the hospital again." Jamie asked in one sentence.**

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**Amanda got out of the car and closed the door, "Jamie I'm fin— ugh" She moaned as Jamie gave her a big squeeze his arm pushing on her injured ribs. She leaned against the car trying to stay on her feet as Lee came to her rescue.**

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**"Jamie she's okay. Why don't you go open the door for us alright." He walked back to the house as Amanda leaned heavily on Lee. "Amanda talk to me are you alright? Are you breathing?" **

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**Amanda nodded her head searching for her voice. "Need to sit." She whispered. Lee supported her while she walked to the door. Once inside Amanda released her grip on Lee's jacket and walked into the family room. Lee followed closely behind her and helped her sit on the couch.**

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**"Amanda is that you? I've been worried sick…" Dotty stopped seeing her daughters pale face and the bandage on her neck. "You're not okay Amanda King." She scolded dropping in front of her.**

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**"Mother I'm fine. Jamie just caught me by surprise outside. I got the wind knocked out of me."**

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**"Uh-huh and your neck?"**

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**"A few stitches. The doctor said it should heal with no scar." Amanda answered. "Where's Phillip?"**

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**Dotty looked at her daughter. She knew a subject change when she heard one. "He's always at basketball practice until six on Thursday."**

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**Amanda was grateful that she had kept some extra cloths at IFF or she would have had a lot more explaining to do. She made Lee destroy her other shirt. It was stained with Raul's blood. But she still felt like she need to shower to rid herself entirely of this day. "I'm going to go shower and change. Lee do you want to stay for supper?"**

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**"Actually I'm going out with Curt and the boys have that overnighter at Bobby's." Dotty interjected.**

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**"On a Thursday night." Amanda questioned disapprovingly.**

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**"They don't have school tomorrow. Teacher in-service. I told them they could. I thought maybe you'd want the night off." Dotty answered pointedly glancing at Lee.**

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**"I see. Thank you mother. I'll be right down Lee."**

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**"I'll probably be gone when you get done. Have a good night. I'll stay out late if you want."**

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**"Mother!" Amanda complained and headed for her bedroom.**

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**Amanda had changed and was drying her hair with a towel as she stepped out of the bathroom. She stopped suddenly seeing Lee sitting on her bed. "You shouldn't be up here. Mother…"**

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**"Is gone. So is Jamie. The house is ours." Lee smiled wickedly.**

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**"I see." Amanda answered. "Dinner?"**

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**"I think I'd like to skip right to dessert." **

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**"Oh. That hot babe of yours uh."**

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**"Yeah she looks great with damp hair."**

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**"Really Stetson?" Amanda replied closing the space between them and leaned in for a kiss. Just before their lips met the phone rang. "Oh brother." Amanda picked up the receiver. "Hello. Yes he's right here." She handed the phone to Lee and went into the bathroom to finish getting ready. Amanda heard the Lee hang up the phone and saw his reflection in the mirror. He had a very odd blank stare. Concerned she asked, "Who was that?" No answer as he moved toward her his expression still blank. "Lee you're scaring me. What's going on?" Lee grabbed her wrist and stuck a needle in her arm emptying its contents. "Lee… what…" She mumbled as she slumped to the floor blacking out.**

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**To be continued…**


	4. Default Chapter Title

**Amanda's head pounded. She tried to open her eyes but the light caused a jolt of pain explode behind her eyes. Getting a feel for her surroundings she knew she was in a vehicle in motion. The cold touch of metal on her wrists confirmed that her hands were handcuffed behind her back. Amanda's legs were also confined, probably rope she told herself. Her brain was foggy and she tried to recall the last thing she remembered. Lee! Her eyes shot wide open uncaring of the previous pain. She was in his car and he still had the same blank stare on his face as he drove. Amanda tried to say his name hoping to talk him out of whatever was happening to him. She was terrified and had no clue what was going on but she knew Lee wasn't in control and that scared her the most. When she attempted to talk she realized her mouth was taped shut.**

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**Lee stopped the car at a red light and looked over at his passenger. Noting that she was awake and took another syringe and griped her arm. Amanda tried to squirm away but Lee held her tighter making her moan in pain. He pushed the needle through her shirt.**

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**Amanda felt the needle puncture her skin and could feel the liquid burn through her arm. Again a wave of nausea and darkness enveloped her.**

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**Amanda felt the car slow to a stop. She forced herself to open her eyes. Armon's face filled her vision as he pulled her roughly from the car. The feeling of fear that was in the pit of her stomach rose to her throat as the reality of her situation penetrated her fog that had settled in her head. Being thrown in the back of a van Amanda searched for Lee. Even if Armon had control of him she felt safer with him near her; she trusted that man and knew that he could never truly hurt her drugs or not. Locating him in the passenger seat she relaxed slightly. They drove 10 minutes and the van came to a halt. Amanda was again dragged from the vehicle and carried into an old apartment complex. Armon threw her down. Amanda moaned as the wind was knocked out of her and her shoulder exploded with pain from the force of the fall. **

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**The terrorist stepped over her and removed the tape. Amanda seeing an opportunity began talking immediately, "Lee, Lee can—" She was silenced by a hard slap.**

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**"You are not allowed to speak, only scream." Armon informed her with a wicked smile. He rolled her over and undid the handcuffs only to secure her hands to a water heater above her head. He tightened them until they almost cut off her circulation. Turning to Lee he spoke again. "Okay Lee, kick her."**

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**Amanda looked at her partner and saw the hesitation. 'Lee _was_ there!' She thought desperately.**

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**"I said kick her, like this." Armon demanded digging a steel-toed boot into her ribs. Amanda cried out in pain. "Yes good. I want to hear you suffer." He said kicking her again. Amanda tried to bite her lip but a grunt slipped out. "Lee kick her." But Lee didn't move. Armon sighed and Amanda could hear him rummaging for something; he came back into view with a needle and injected Lee with it. "Now kick Amanda." Again no response, which led to more drugs.**

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**While his attention was directed on Lee Amanda pulled her lock pick from her sleeve. She silently thanked Lee for insisting that every shirt she had should be equipped with one. With her knack for finding trouble and her forgetfulness Lee didn't want to take any chances that she wouldn't put her pick in her shirt every morning. At the time Amanda was annoyed. Okay so she forgot the password a lot at first, but she'd changed from the flighty housewife to a pretty good agent in the past three years. 'I owe him for this' she thought as she began working on the cuffs. She was aware of the exchange between Armon and Lee and Amanda feared he would continue to inject him with drugs until Lee kicked her or died. "Lee please. Kick me." She pleaded hoping to stop an overdose.**

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**Armon glanced at Amanda. She stopped her work on the cuffs so he wouldn't find out and take her only chance away. He realized that Lee would do whatever Amanda said and he roughly pulled Lee over to Amanda, "Say it again or I'll inject him with enough drugs to kill an elephant."**

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**Amanda looked into Lee's unseeing eyes. "Lee please do it or he'll kill us both." She could see tears welling up in his eyes as he resisted. **

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**"Beat her or I'll kill her." Armon hissed.**

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**Something snapped inside his head. 'Kill Amanda? No!' Whatever it takes to save her. In his drug induced mind he connected beat her or kill her. 'The only way to save her is to beat her.' With all his might kicked her.**

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**Amanda was unprepared for the force of the blow. Stars exploded before her eyes and she thought she'd pass out. 'No' she told herself 'get the cuffs undone.' Blow after blow came at her with more intensity that she thought possible. Finally the cuffs came undone and she rolled trying to get away from Lee. "Lee stop!" She cried realizing he was coming after her. He stopped. Armon came at her but Amanda brought her foot up in his groin and he doubled over. Quickly Amanda searched him for a gun and found it. "Move over there" she instructed. Armon complied. Amanda cuffed him to the heater and hit him with the handle of the gun knocking him out. She saw the hate in Lee's eyes and Amanda was worried he would kill the man and quickly found another set of handcuffs. "Lee I'm sorry." She apologized and handcuffed him across the room. She sat in the middle, all her adrenalin was gone and she was in pain. All she could do was lie down and wait for the drugs to wear off in Lee system because she had no energy to even move to get help or find a phone. The darkness once again enveloped her.**

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**Lee forced his eyes open. He realized immediately that he was cuffed to the wall. His vision was blurred and he blinked furiously to get at least an idea of what was going on. The last thing he remembered was being in Amanda's room when the phone rang. He was in an old run down room now. There was a faint light on over in the corner and he could make out a small form in the middle of the room. He focused on the face and in horror realized it was Amanda. _Beat her or kill her_ rang through his head as he stared at the bruises on her face. 'I did that' he thought and began to pull at the cuffs cursing himself for not having a lock pick on him. He always warned Amanda not to forget hers; she won't let me forget this. Feeling around behind him he realized he was attached to a pipe and he began pulling with all his might. Finally about to give up the memory of kicking Amanda flashed through his head and he jerked the pipe free. He stumbled quickly to her side. "Amanda can you hear me?" He asked gently rolling her over. No response. He felt for a pulse and found a strong steady beat. Letting out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "I'm going to go get help." He spoke softly and stood. Surveying the room for a phone his gaze fell on Armon handcuffed on the opposite side of the room apparently unconscious. Hate filled him. He made Lee hurt his Amanda. "Now is not the time. Help Amanda and then you can take care of Armon." He said to himself.**

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**Lee walked out the building. The sun was rising and he wondered how long they had been there. He and Amanda arrived at her house a little after six. Did they spend the whole night here? And where was here? Quickly he found a pay phone and dialed Billy's number.**

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**"Hello?" Melrose answered.**

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**"Billy it's Lee." He announced.**

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**"Lee where are you? Is Amanda with you?" He questioned clearly concerned.**

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**"I'm not sure where we are, but Amanda is with me. She's hurt pretty bad."**

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**"Hold on the line we'll get a tap and get a team out ASAP." The line was silent for few minutes. "Okay we've got you're location and we're rolling. Will you be by that phone?"**

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**"No, there's a building across the street. It's an old apartment complex the number is 507."  
  
"All right we'll be there in 45 minutes. The paramedics are already dispatched they should beat us there."**

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**"Thanks Billy." Lee answered and hung up the phone. Sprinting back to Amanda's side his mind was reeling. How could he allow this to happen? How could he do this to the woman he loved even if he was drugged there was no excuse.**

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**Amanda hadn't moved and Lee was worried that she had stopped breathing. He checked her pulse and found in was weaker than before but still there. Lee picked her up cradling her and her was again amazed by how light she was. Tears fell down his face as the memories of what he did to his Amanda came flooding back. He could hear the sirens in the background as Amanda began to stir. "Amanda, can you hear me?"**

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**Amanda struggled slightly opening her eyes. She looked into Lee's face and fear choked her. The look on her face was a slap in Lee's face. He never thought that emotion would be directed at him. "Lee?" She calmed slightly seeing there was emotion in his eyes, but in was a sorrow she knew she had caused by her reaction.**

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**"Amanda…" He started but was at a loss for words. A simple apology could not make up for what he had done.**

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**"Lee stop. This wasn't your fault. It was Armon, he was controlling you."**

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**"Amanda I hurt you. I kicked you I—"**

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**"Lee Stetson drop it. I'm okay. I don't blame you for any of what happened here." She interrupted as she tried to stand. The paramedics entered the building and surveyed the scene. They weren't given much information and weren't sure what to expect. Seeing a bruised Amanda struggling to her feet they directed their attention to her. "I'm fine I just want to get out of here." She told them.**

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**"Amanda at least let them look at you outside." Lee pleaded.**

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**She nodded and they helped her outside into the ambulance. Lee was about to jump in with them but Amanda put a hand on his chest and stopped him with her eyes. She didn't want him to see the effects of what he had done. Knowing he had done them was bad enough. She was silently hoping he would have no memory of any of today but she assumed the trauma was so great he couldn't forget or he wouldn't let himself forget. She would get over this but she worried that Lee wouldn't. **

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**To be continued…**


	5. Default Chapter Title

**_I Would Never Cause You Pain****_**

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**Billy and Francine pulled up only to see that the rescue squad was still there. "Billy you don't think she's dead do you?" Francine voiced his concerns. Lee had said she was hurt pretty bad. Why hadn't they taken her straight to the hospital? Stopping the car Billy searched for Scarecrow and spotted him hovering by the doors of the ambulance. "Lee!" Francine yelled to get his attention. **

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**Lee turned around and Billy was unprepared for the level of emotion on his face. "No." Billy silently breathed fearing the worst. "Lee, is she… Amanda's not dead."**

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**"No! No I could never…" Lee trailed off barely under control. "They're working on her now. She refuses to go back to the hospital. She thinks we're there too much." Lee answered absently as he sat on a nearby curb.**

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**"Oh thank God. When I saw the look on your face I thought for sure she was gone." Francine replied. "What happened? Amanda's mother called IFF worried because she hadn't heard from her all day."**

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**Francine's statement sunk in. "All day?" What time is it?"**

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**"7:30" Billy answered and Lee realized it was getting darker. The sun wasn't rising it was setting! At that moment the doors opened and Amanda was helped carefully out. Lee stood but kept his distance; he wasn't sure if she wanted him near her. Billy walked up to her and the Paramedics. "How are you Amanda?" Billy asked placing a hand on her arm for support. She flinched as he pressed on one of her bruises. "I'm sorry." He apologized.**

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**"No it's okay. I'm fine. Where's Lee I would like to go home."**

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**"I'm right here." Lee answered hesitantly.**

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**She looked at him and saw the fear in his eyes. She wanted to cry and suddenly all the tension hit her and her eyes filled with tears. Lee closed the distance and held his hand out not sure if she wanted his embrace but Lee's desire was to be there if she wanted him there. He was pleased when she quickly stepped into his open arms. He engulfed her gently not knowing what was hurt or how badly. "Let's get out of here okay?" He said quietly. She nodded leaving her head buried in his shoulder not able to meet anyone's gaze. Lee looked up at Billy, "Armon is cuffed to a heater in the building. Last time I checked he was unconscious."**

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**Billy nodded. "We'll take care of it. Use my car to take Amanda home. The debriefing can wait for now but we'll at least need a statement tonight. You can call me later."**

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**"Thanks Billy." Lee replied and guided Amanda to the car. She gingerly got in. Her motions were scaring Lee. He needed to know how badly he had hurt her. The paramedics let her go but he knew she was adamant about not going to the hospital. When they came out to talk with him, before Billy got there, they were clearly frustrated and told him she should at least stay with someone who could check on her every hour and she needed to see a doctor Monday morning to make sure all her bleeding had stopped. They warned him that if she became hard to wake up or dizzy and weak she needed to get to the ER right away. Needless to say that conversation didn't help his imagination. **

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**They drove in silence until Amanda spoke quietly, "I don't want to go home." She didn't want to face her mother's questions right now and she couldn't handle being near her bathroom. She knew the past few hours were not Lee's fault but she didn't want to think about that blank stare or the fear she felt when she realized Lee was not the Lee she had grown to love and trust. It wasn't Lee; she wanted to be with him right then. **

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**"All right. Where?" Lee asked. He was uncertain if she wanted to be with him and he didn't want to suggest his apartment.**

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**"Your place. I'll call mother from there, and we can call Billy and tell him what happened." Amanda answered.**

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**Lee saw his opportunity, "Amanda… what _did_ happen?"**

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**Lee watched her as fear and hesitation flashed over her face. She knew she would have to debrief him first but didn't want to do it while he was driving. "Lee I'll tell you everything after we get to the apartment." She finally replied.**

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**Lee unlocked his door while Amanda leaned against the wall for support. She wasn't sure how long she could stay standing. Her side burned with pain. The ribs that had been cracked where now broken and she had bruises everywhere. As the paramedics were examining her she was thankful she had made Lee wait outside. **

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**The door opened and Lee helped her in and sat her on the couch. "Can I get you anything?" He asked wanting to make her as comfortable as possible.**

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**"No. Thanks. I just want to sit." She answered with her eyes closed and head resting on the back of the couch. She knew Lee wanted answers and she knew she needed to do it now. "It's not that bad." She said flatly opening her eyes and meeting his stare. His face softened and he took a step forward. She patted the couch encouraging him to sit next to her. He complied quickly and she carefully leaned into his waiting arms.**

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**"Amanda I hurt you. I don't care if I gave you a hang nail, I still hurt you." He whispered in her hear.**

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**"You are not at fault." She said half turning to face him but the sudden movement made her suck in air at the pain.**

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**"Let me see?" She wasn't sure if it was a request and she wasn't sure if she should let him look at her bruises. She did know that it was important to him and unless she let him see what he had done, in his mind it would forever be ten times worse. Silently she began to unbutton her shirt. **

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**"Oh Amanda…" He trailed off unable to continue. Her abdomen was completely black and her sides were a nasty shade of purple. "Amanda how could I ever do such a thing to you?" **

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**"Lee it wasn't you. That's what I keep trying to tell you." She pleaded with him.**

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**"Amanda it was me. I can remember exactly what I was thinking when I did this. Armon said 'beat her or I'll kill her' and in my mind I felt I only had those two options. If I beat you you'd live and the harder I did it the safer you'd be." He finished obviously crying.**

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**"Lee that's the sweetest thing you've ever done." She said also crying.**

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**"What!" Lee had no idea what she was talking about. He was looking at the battered form of his fiancé, which he did, and she thought it was a good thing!**

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**"Lee you were willing to do whatever it took to save my life and you did it with every ounce of your strength." She explained. **

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**"Amanda—" Just as he was about to tell her she was crazy the phone rang. He blew out an exasperated breath and answered the phone, "Hello. Hi Billy. Yes she's right here. Now? Over the phone?" Lee couldn't believe Billy wanted to debrief Amanda over the phone after what she had been through.**

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**"Lee let me talk with him." She stated.**

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**"It was supposed to be just a statement." Lee continued to argue.**

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**"Lee give me the phone." She spoke with a firmer tone as she buttoned her blouse. Lee obeyed and handed her the receiver and listened while Amanda in a completely neutral voice relayed the accounts of the previous night. From Lee drugging her in the bathroom and car to knocking Armon out and handcuffing him and Lee. Lee was amazed at her strength as she spoke. Scenes would flash through his mind as she gave them words. While she continued to report to Billy he took her arm and rolled up her sleeve on her left arm. Distracted she didn't realize what he was doing until the bruised handprint was visible along with the bruising from his needle. Lee was so upset he stood up and Amanda was afraid he was going to break something or hurt himself and she apologized to Billy, "Sir I really need to go can I give you any other information you need tomorrow? Thank you Sir. I will sir." She finished and hung up the phone.**

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**"I'm a monster." He commented with his back to her.**

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**"No Lee. No you're not. Please just let this go."**

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**"How can I?" He asked turning to face her. Never had she seen such pain in his eyes.**

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**"Because I want you to." She said simply. "You owe me my deepest desire."**

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**"What would that be?" He asked.**

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**"For you to forgive yourself." **

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**"That's not what you wrote down when we made the bet." He countered.**

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**"No but it's what I want." She said with a look of determination set on her face. No was not an option.**

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**"I will try on one condition."**

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**"That would be?"**

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**"I get to fulfill you deepest desire on the paper too." He said with a slight smile. He wasn't ready to forget everything happened but he would try to forgive himself. He didn't deserve her. She was making this all too easy on him.**

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**"That could be arranged." She answered leaning in for a kiss. He welcomed her willingly.**

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**"So what was your deepest desire?"**

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**"Skiing this weekend at Pinetop." She replied.**

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**"Amanda, the skiing is supposed to be lousy this weekend." **

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**"Exactly." She answered and kissed him again. "What was your deepest desire?" She asked between kisses.**

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**"Forever with you." He said with a devilish grin.**

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**"Two points for you Stetson." She laughed.**

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**He mocked injury; "I only get two points for that."**

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**"You've gotta earn them I don't give them away." She teased.**

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**"I've got a long weekend to get on the board." He said lowering her onto the couch.**

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**THE END**

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